The week started out okay with our doctor's appointment and glucose test going well on Tuesday, and a really nice visit from Rachel and Eleanor on Thursday. But it turned into another bad week with the death of my maternal grandmother on Thursday night.
Milestones: Baby should be less curled up now and be about 15 inches long. The baby book says the baby is tasting all the food I eat and might react by kicking. I think I've felt that quite often actually.
What I miss the most: My loved ones. Craving: Grapes, raisins, nuts Anti-craving: Coffee Symptoms: Lots of trouble sleeping, painful baby kicks. Baby-size: Still an eggplant Weight gain: 24.5
Rachel and Eleanor
The glucose test is really gross by the way. I haven't had any soda during my pregnancy and I've been avoiding any beverage that isn't water, milk, 100% juice, coffee, tea, or the occasional delightful milkshake. So it's kind of ironic that I had to drink something that might give a person diabetes to test if I have diabetes. The first sips were delicious and orange soda like. But even though I only had to drink half of the tiny bottle I really wanted to throw up by the time I was done. If you fail this part of the test, you have to drink a larger bottle. If I failed, I had already committed to just following a diabetic diet instead of drinking a larger bottle of this trash. Luckily I got the thumbs up from the doctor; no prenatal diabetes here.
Milestones: Kevin built a little cradle that our friends passed down to us. It makes the guest room look more like a baby room already. We're going to have to move the guest room upstairs soon.
The baby should be starting to open his eyes now, and might respond to light
What I miss the most: Not debating the best time to start feeding the baby solids. My mother: immediately. Me: 6 months-ish. Craving: Grape juice. Keep it coming. It's baby wine. Anti-craving: Anything I suspect might cause acid reflux. Symptoms: Stuffy nose, bad acid reflux, a lot of trouble sleeping. My left knee is a little achy. I sometimes see stars like I might pass out, but I don't actually feel like I might pass out. I looked it up and it seems like I might need to eat or drink more so I'm trying to drink plenty of water and spread out my eating. Baby-size: Still an eggplant Weight gain: 23
My maternal grandmother took care of me for a few years when I was little. She was there when I lost my first tooth. She moved to Miami with my grandfather in about 1993. She stayed there when my grandfather died in 1997. She was only 62 at that time, but she never dated again. She was the second call I made after my parents when Kevin proposed. When I told her I was pregnant she screamed with delight. She was making some kind of crib bedding for the baby, and we were both looking forward to her visiting after the baby was born (in about 12 weeks). The last time I talked to her a day ago she asked about the baby and reminded me to send her pictures of my belly because she hadn't seen it yet.
My mother spoke to the doctor yesterday afternoon and he said my grandmother had emphysema and bronchitis but she would be fine, and he would have sent her home with oxygen already except she has a cortisone allergy so they couldn't give her cortisone. They gave her an anticoagulant shot in her stomach as a matter of routine and she developed a subcutaneous hematoma (a bruise). It was causing her pain, so they gave her pain killers. She lost lucidity and was in and out after that. The doctor put her on the subacute cardiac floor even though he said her heart was fine so that they could observe her more carefully. Yesterday after her friend Sylvia went home for the evening, she died from a pulmonary embolism.
Do you understand? Because I don't. I don't understand anything. Today is the two month anniversary of my father passing away. If anyone says, "Everything happens for a reason," one more time, I am going to scream.
It's snowing in New York this morning.
With my grandmother on Christmas when I was 3 and she was 48
The week of my college graduation, she was 66 years old
Visiting Mima in 2007, 72 years old
Dancing with my grandmother at my wedding 2009, 74 years old
There will be no baby update today. I'm exhausted. It's been 8 weeks since my father passed away, and today we heard that my grandmother is in the hospital because she couldn't breathe. We had been planning to fly her up to stay with us for a week after the baby came. Now it's not looking likely as it will depend on her treatment.
We're not sure what she has, but at a minimum she has emphysema, or possibly cancer. She's fairly young at 76 for someone who is soon to be a great-grandmother, so she will probably take treatment well if it's emphysema, but it's a degenerative disease and you cannot get better.
She's a smoker, or was for most of her life, so this isn't unexpected so much as awful timing. Doesn't seem like we get room to breathe around here. First my father passed away, something I am still struggling with every day. Then Kevin's father had a heart attack three weeks later, though he has recovered well. And now my grandmother is sick, which is probably too much for my mother to handle so soon after my dad.
Milestones: There is a working theory that the baby can come when it's called now. This is of course, insanity, but you be the judge. Kevin first tried to get the baby to kick for him by calling him on New Years Day. He said something like, "Come here, son." Then about two days later, he tried again and it worked again. At this point I think Kevin decided to stop pushing his luck. Then Friday night, after my mother had spent a while trying to get the baby to kick for her, I said, "Trying calling him." As soon as I said it he kicked. We tried again Saturday morning and again it worked. So yeah, the baby is advanced.
What I miss the most: Lying on my stomach on top of Kevin. I can't even lie comfortable next to him on the couch because my belly kind of hangs off awkwardly. Hot. Craving: I am milk. Sometimes also crave ice cream, or milk and cookies. Vinegar on food. Anti-craving: Apple juice. Symptoms: Stuffy nose, bad but short-lived acid reflux. I've had a lot of trouble sleeping this week. I sleep for about 3-4 hours, and something wakes me up and then I'm up for an hour or more before I can go back to sleep. There's no baby yet! How is this fair? Good news though, my left knee stopped hurting! Woo! Baby-size: Eggplant Weight gain: 20.5
The week began with me luxuriating in a hotel in Delaware while the boys made profitable sports bets at the casino, and promptly lost it all on craps. I earned my keep by taking this awesome photo:
The unbearable hotness of bears
If walking over 50 blocks in Manhattan was my stabymoon, then this was Kevin's bearmoon.
The rest of the week was fairly calm. Kevin started winter session classes on Tuesday , and I had dinner with Christina on Wednesday.
I finished out the week visiting my mother and packing up dad's books to take with me. Also, we had more snow in New Jersey... five inches on Friday! (On top of the only partially melted two feet of snow from last week.) Kevin and Jon came to pick me up and helped my mother get rid of a bunch of heavy stuff in her apartment. Thanks guys! You're the best.
This week can be summarized as follows, pregnant food-benders, visits with friends, and a baby-visiting bender. Let's start with the belly picture in our hometown Snowpocalypse (2 feet of snow) and baby stats.
24 weeks + 4 days
Milestones: Lots of people felt the baby kick this week including Janice, Sarah, Brian, and Brady. The kicks are stronger and more frequent, and he especially likes to kick anywhere I have tight clothing or my seatbelt, which I usually move out of the way for him, or my ribs which I have not yet figured out how to move.
For about a month now I've been feeling the baby roll or somersault when I get in the shower. I don't know how I managed to leave it off the blog considering it feels really weird. The strength of the rolls has increased and I have started to look forward to his acrobatics at shower time.
When I first thought I felt the baby I thought it felt less like a kick or punch and more like a feel from the inside. This week that's become pronounced. Sometimes I feel a hand or foot dragging along the inside. It's super weird.
Also, supposedly this week, his lungs are developing the internal respiratory branches as well as cells that produce a substance that will help his air sacs inflate once he gets outside.
What I miss the most: Reaching the floor. I'm already only 5 feet tall, so I can only reach up to five and half feet high. Now suddenly I can't reach things lower than two feet from the ground. This means that the entire universe of things I can reach are in a small 3.5 feet span. Craving: I drink milk. That's the main food I consume. Sometimes I also crave ice cream, cookies, or salty things. New Year's Day I had to have french toast or people might have gotten hurt. Anti-craving: Apple juice because it consistently gives me acid reflux. Food without sugar or salt. Symptoms: I might have a cold. I hope I do. Because if I don't, I have the most horrible symptom yet. It's a permanent stuffy-nose-alternating-to-runny-nose situation. I would prefer acid reflux or even throwing up. Not breathing sucks. But don't worry, there's no need to choose! I still have acid reflux and left knee pain as well. Baby-size: Ear of corn Weight gain: 20+?
Other stuff-- We got stuck on the Cape for a few extra days and saw Janice and Darren on Monday. We went to Friendlies and I went on a preggo-bender of cheese waffle fries and mint-chocolate-chip-milkshake. Only when I snapped out of the food daze did it occur to me that the fries and cheese were probably loaded with the chemicals I've been trying so hard to avoid. Mommy-fail. Tuesday we visited the Soward family and their new super-chilled out baby, Oliver. We spent little more than 24 hours at home before heading out again to visit the Grave's preemie, Connor, who recently came home. He was deliciously small like a brand-new newborn at 8 pounds. We spent a quiet New Year's Eve with some of my good friends. New Year's Day began with me ordering breakfast for 2-3 people and eating it all myself, and ended with vegging on Brady's couch in Philly.
We had a quiet New Year's Eve with some friends of mine this year. I was glad to see 2010 end. Will Arnett said it best, "Hey 2010...[censored]. I'd call you an asshole, but that wouldn't be fair to assholes." Here's hoping 2011 brings all happy baby-related things.
If you're not currently pregnant or haven't been pregnant in the immediate past, you've never heard of a "babymoon." A "babymoon" is a way to spend money on yourself, instead of the child growing inside of you, which seems sensible if you're receiving weekly emails telling you what vegetable your fetus is the size of (current size: maize). In lieu of traveling somewhere exotic with someone who let her passport expire, hates flying, is uncomfortable everywhere, and doesn't like the way she looks in anything but a Snuggie, I decided we might take advantage of the things she's long wanted to do in New York but hasn't done because those things are boring.
We started by going for soup dumplings. My wife didn't complain about the soup dumplings unless expressing frustration that the soup dumplings weren't on the menu and wondering why I'd take her somewhere for soup dumplings that doesn't have soup dumplings sounds like a complaint (note: the people next to us were loudly and obviously eating soup dumplings). Next we made it through nearly twenty yards of Central Park before my wife complained that she was tired--a reasonable claim for someone in her advanced state--so we did what anyone tired does and took several hundred photos of her belly in front of bushes.
After Central Park, we went to the American Museum of Natural History, which I will confess is not boring, if only for the floating blue whale the size of a rocket ship and Brontosaurus in disguise. Unfortunately, my wife turned into the little-understood Pregosaurus halfway through the museum. The Pregosaurus, I learned, is low to the ground and slow moving. It is unpredictable, omnivorous, and has to sit in Starbucks between feedings to complain about its feet.
Pregosaurus and Allosaurus
For the evening portion of the "Babymoon," we took in the Radio City Christmas Spectacular, sponsored by every corporation in the United States. This is the narrative arc of the RCCS for the uninitiated: Santa invents reasons for forty white women to kick their legs in the air for an hour (rising tension), some kid suddenly and unconvincingly discovers the True Meaning of Christmas (climax), Jesus--unmentioned to that point--is born in front of live camels (denouement). Before any of this happened, my wife went to the restroom. When she came out, she said, I can't tell you how many things I have to complain about in there.
Possible Solutions!
1) Turn the "Babymoon" into a "Maybemoon," in which we discuss all the things we might do; ultimately, do nothing
2) Preemptively complain about crazy things (could this sunset BE more orange?) and see how wife responds
3) Invent "Husbandmoon," which takes place in Florida during Spring Training and is greeted enthusiastically by a lack of complaints (hard)
We tried to make the best of the beginning of the week. It's supposed to be really important to have good dental hygiene while pregnant so I went for a cleaning and check on Tuesday. As far as the dentist could tell without an x-ray, no cavities. I think I like the no x-ray system best. We also had a romantic joint eye doctor appointment on Wednesday- Kevin got new glasses but my prescription remains unchanged since 2004. Sadly the style of my glasses is out.
But anyway, we took advantage of my dentist being in the city to go out on Tuesday. We got soup dumplings after my appointment, walked through Central Park, and then went to the American Museum of Natural History. We were particularly excited about the dinosaur exhibit after watching about four hours of dinosaur documentary with Brady last weekend. It's a little sad that so many dinosaurs that we learned about when we were little have been "revised" and renamed. For example, the brontosaurus doesn't exist, and now it's the apatosaurus. Thankfully, tyrannosaurus rex and stegosaurus still exist. But the real stars of the dinosaur world are now the diplodocus, closely related barosaurus, and the somewhat T-rex-looking but not related, Allosaurus. It was fun discussing how old Baby Clou would have to be before we could bring him back here. We're guessing it won't be for a few years.
23 weeks + 2 days belly shot in Central Park
The Barosaurus at the entrance of the museum
Self-portrait with an old-school triceratops
Kevin was also pretty psyched to see the gigantic whale in the Oceans Exhibit, though ironically it took us a lot of effort and time to find it. It took even longer to make cheesy videos on their email machines, but I insisted on it.
Kevin and his Moby Dick, if Moby were a 94-foot blue whale
Videos best with sound
You can hear me complaining that it makes no sense that we're sharing a wetsuit
Afterward, we went for dinner at a Peruvian-Chinese restaurant, and then to Rockefeller for pictures with the tree and the Radio City Christmas Spectacular with the Rockettes. Apparently, mom and dad brought me when I was five or six and I critiqued Santa's credibility. I don't remember it, but this has always been one of their favorite stories.
Then we went on a visiting-family spree, starting with my grandmother Daisy, then Christmas Eve and the day before it with my mother, visiting Chrissy's family who truly understands what we're going through. Finally, we hauled out to the Cape for Christmas dinner with Kevin's family. They showered us with love and presents for us and for the baby. Despite our best efforts though, Christmas without my dad has been extremely sad.
Soon-to-be Great Grandma (bisaubuela) Daisy is 80 years old
Gwen, Matthew, Chrissy, and Owen
23 Weeks Milestones: Baby is kicking all the way up on the top of my belly now. Kevin has developed sympathetic pregnancy symptoms (also known as the common cold) complete with fatigue, sore throat, stuffy nose, difficulty sleeping, and increased appetite. Today he almost said "I shouldn't kiss you because I'm pregnant," when he meant to say "because I'm sick." What I miss the most: Sleeping comfortably. Being allowed to lose weight. Craving: MILK, DAIRY, ICE CREAM, CHOCOLATE, I want to bathe in it, also yogurt, egg nog, fruit bars, sugar sugar sugar. I am trying to restrain myself... and failing. Anti-craving: Food without sugar or salt. Symptoms: Acid reflux, stuffy nose, left knee still hurts. The floor is far away and uncomfortable to reach. Baby-size: Mango! Weight gain: 19.5 plus? Weighing myself on Christmas wasn't going to happen
