Wife: It's not fun if you don't complain.
Me: You want me to complain?
Wife: It's like you don't even love me.
You might remember that my wife complains about my complaining, an entirely reasonable position for someone so tightlipped about her own world weariness. In contrast to her previous position, however, she now complains about my not complaining. To review: My wife complains, complains about my complaining, complains about my not complaining. She's a triple threat of logic.
Why, you might wonder, did I not complain? One possibility is that my wife told me not to complain. Another, more plausible, possibility is that James wakes up before 4:45 am every day, and I can't feel anything by the end of the night.
2) Not complain